Monday Morning: April 2008

Friday, 25 April 2008

Cause there's beauty in the breakdown.

Shaking like a dog shittin' razorblades,
waking up next to nothing after dreaming of you and me
I'm waking up all alone, waking up so relieved
while you're taking your time with apologies.

Being 20 is all about neither giving a damn about psycho bitches luring around nor being too trusting. I won't wish for you to just drop dead cause I really dont have the time wishing for you to die. And I couldnt care less if you read this crap, or your bestfriends or whoever that is related to you. You have issues with yourself and YOU'RE ONE IN DENIAL FUCK.

Oh, you really don't have to waste your time typing out a long ass message on Friendster to me, confessing to dirty deeds and BEGGING me not to tell your bestfriend that you've confessed. Cause why?

Why of cause you didnt want your bestfriend to know that whatever you've told him/her about whatever that had happened was actually just a...ermm... a fucking figment of your imagination.

So tell me, how psycho can one get? This one is the epitomy of psycho.

I'll do a proper entry regarding my 20th and sort. And yesterday I went Dblo after so long (since sept last year!) and MOS. MOS was disappointing, the crowd sucks and only main arena was opened cause Smoove which was spinning house and trance music was empty so they closed the area.

I gotta go rest, work at 12am later. Mucho love.

// posted by faezah @ 6:49 pm 0 Comments

Friday, 11 April 2008

won't you show me wheres the money is.

I'm back to what I do best- picking up calls.
Back to Mcdelivery, back to unconventional working hours.
Like tonight, I start work at 10pm.
Haha!
and tomorrow, we're heading to the zoo before heading to work at 9pm.
Haha!

My parents finally accepted the fact that I do not want to continue school straight away.But I hope they will accept the fact that I've used the 100 bucks for the application fee that they gave to me.
Oh! I met up with Fi yesterday after so long cuz girl wanna get apple bottom jeans.

Anyways, my dad finally bought me a new phone la fuccccck! U guys wouldnt wanna know what phone I was using before this, seriously.Like finally, daddy. What took you so long to realise I was in dire need of a new phone? Tsk.

Fi aku nak gmbr. ok bye.

// posted by faezah @ 2:54 pm 0 Comments

Tuesday, 8 April 2008

Tuesday with me.

some random dude, probably someone I've never chat with before asked me :

"in the club?"

I went... "HUH?". Whenever I gave a huge HUH, it seriously means that I got no fucking idea what u're talking about. Not one bit.

and he went on,

"in the club today?"

This guy probably dropped out of kindegarten.

I asked, "WHAT in the club?"

AT the point of time, it suddenly hit me that he wanna know whether i'm clubbing tonight.

I went on,

"Today is Tuesday."

He answered, "SO?"

SO THE REST IS FUCKING HISTORY. go figure.

Does all this mask whatever I really wanna blog actually? About feeling stupid and foolish lately?
About trying my best to think positively, to not burst my own bubble.
I hate it when I suddenly dont think about it but you triggered my memory and I have to relive it all over again. I'm a fake, I'm pretentious. And I did all these cause i'm a sucker for you... and your feelings.And all cause I'm being this selfless motherfucking bitch, I am killing myself.So why dont you just shoot me in the head.

// posted by faezah @ 4:41 pm 0 Comments

Friday, 4 April 2008

The last straw

A few questions that I need to know

How you could ever hurt me so

I need to know what I've done wrong

And how long it's been going on

Was it that I never paid enough attention

Or did I not give enough affection

Not only will your answers keep me sane

But I'll know never to make the same mistake again

You can tell me to my face

Or even on the phone

You can write it in a letter

Either way I've have to know

Did I never treat you right
Did I always start the fight

Either way I'm going out of my mind

All the answers to my questions I have to find

To whom, this may be concerned

To those who may want to learn

I'm writing this to you,

The last straw.

You've drained out my energy, my tears, my hopes that I once had.

I've never knew that trust can be so easy to find, and maybe a little difficult to lose. I pray that I could still trust you this time around, but as I sat here typing this ridiculous entry away, I found out too soon that forgiving and trusting you will be shooting myself in the foot. Trust was like a piece of me for I, as naive as I can be, put it all on you.

They say, "What goes around,comes around"

I say, I hope it wont happen to you.

For I wouldnt want you to experience this.

This most excruciating heartbreak moment I am feeling.

You say, why wld I wanna put this all up for every single soul to know.

These dirty laundry I am hanging up.

Cause,

writing it in my diary would means I would chance upon it again.

I hope blogger closes down one fine day.

Close down for good.

And take away the memories with it.

// posted by faezah @ 12:04 am 0 Comments

Tuesday, 1 April 2008

AKU STRESS PASAL GI FRIENDSTER TAKLEH, GI WEBSITE LAIN TAKLEH,
GI KEJE, TAKDE KEJE,
GI BERAK TAKLEH
GI TIDO, TAKNAK
GI MANDI, BESOK AHHHH
GI TGK TV, MALAS AHHH

ABEH APER LAGI...
GI MAMPOS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

OK BYE.

// posted by faezah @ 4:08 am 0 Comments

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